6.1.3.17: Pronoun Agreement
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Pronoun agreement can be trickier than it might seem on the surface. The rule is that we must make sure our pronouns agree in number and gender with the nouns they are replacing. For example, when we write a sentence about a girl named Sophia, we would use "she" as the pronoun to refer to her.
But things get a little more confusing when we are talking about a kind of abstract person, and the “rule” on this subject has recently changed in most circles. In the recent past, to avoid sexist language, we couldn’t write "he" or "she". Instead, we had to write "he or she".
But, because most people would just end up writing "they", which technically does not agree in number, the “rule” began to change. This is a great example of how living languages, like English, change, and the change happens when people make a change happen. It’s really pretty exciting!
It used to be incorrect to use what we now call “the singular they.” Here is an example:
Now, many style guides accept the use of "they" or "them" to refer to a singular noun.
So, now, this would be considered correct:
When in doubt, using a plural noun is safest:
This way, you avoid any awkwardness of the singular "them", and your pronoun is now also in agreement with "children".
NOTE: Because the use of the singular "they" is new, you may find some people who disagree, but most academics now agree that the singular "they" is correct. Please always refer to your style guide, as some style guides still recommend not using the singular "they".