4.2.3: Reflexive and Reciprocal Pronouns

Reflexive Pronouns

A reflexive pronoun (ending in -self or -selves) is used when the subject and the object are the same person. The reflexive pronoun points back to the subject of the sentence. Specific verbs use the reflexive pronoun. See the chart for examples:

Pronoun	Reflexive Pronoun	Example Sentence
I	myself	I hurt myself while playing.
You (singular)	yourself	You should be proud of yourself.
He	himself	He looked at himself in the mirror.
She	herself	She did the work all by herself.
It	itself	The cat cleaned itself.
We	ourselves	We helped ourselves to some snacks.
You (plural)	yourselves	You all should take care of yourselves.
They	themselves	They introduced themselves to the new class.

Using "by" with Reflexive Pronouns

The preposition "by" is often used with reflexive pronouns (myself, yourself, himself, herself, itself, ourselves, yourselves, themselves) to indicate that someone is alone or performing an action without help or company. Here's how it works:

1. To mean "alone":

   • Example: "She lives by herself."
     (This means she lives alone, without anyone else.)

2. To mean "without help":

   • Example: "He fixed the car by himself."
     (This means he fixed the car without assistance from anyone else.)

3. To emphasize independence or effort:

   • Example: "I completed the project by myself."
     (This emphasizes that the speaker completed the project independently.)

Test Your Knowledge

Below are sentences using "by" with reflexive pronouns. Identify the purpose of the "by" phrase in each sentence by choosing one of the following:

1. To mean "alone"

2. To mean "without help"

3. To emphasize independence or effort

_____ 1. After the argument, he sat by himself in the corner of the room.
_____ 2. They built the tree-house by themselves over the summer.
_____ 3. I enjoy reading books by myself in the evenings.
_____ 4. He solved the complex math problem by himself in just 10 minutes.
_____ 5. The little boy tied his shoes by himself for the first time.
_____ 6. Sometimes, it’s nice to have dinner by myself.

Answers:

1.  1 (Means "alone.")

2 . 2 (Means "without help.")

3.  1 (Means "alone.")

4.  3 (Emphasizes independence or effort.)

5. 2 (Means "without help.")

6. 1 (Means "alone.")

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Chart and Exercise "Using By..." and questions  created with ChatGPT.

Reflexive Pronouns with "by" From: Grammar Quizzes by Julie Sevastopoulos is licensed for use under CC BY-NC-SA 4.0 International.

Watch the video for an overview of Reflexive pronouns:

Example Reflexive Verbs and Verb Phrases

He believes in himself.	He hurt himself.
She blames herself.	He introduced himself.
He cut himself.	He excused himself.
She enjoys herself.	They painted the house themselves.
He feels sorry for himself.	He pinched himself.
She helps herself.	They marketed themselves well.
He is pleased with himself.	He is proud of himself.
He takes care of himself.	He works for himself.
She talks to herself.	They wished themselves good luck.

Exercise 2.12

Write in the correct reflexive pronoun.

1. The actress was proud of _____________ when she won an Oscar award.

2. Jack was pleased with _______________

3. They blamed _______________ for losing the game.

4. You can build it _______________ if you follow the directions.

5. The mouse hurt ____________ when it took the cheese.

6. I quickly dressed ____________ and then went to the kitchen.

7. My roommate works at home, so he spends the day by _______________

8. I was proud of _______________ for getting an "A" on my test.

9. She went to the movies by ________________

10. We fixed the sink _________________ instead of calling a plumber.

Reciprocal Pronouns

Each other vs. One another

EACH OTHER
Each other like all pronouns refers back to a noun that comes before it (an antecedent). However, because it is a reciprocal pronoun, it refers to two nouns or a group noun. It expresses what one person feels toward or does for the other; the other feels or does the same in return.
RECIPROCAL —TWO
Sophie loves Jim and Jim loves Sophie. ⇒ Sophie and Jim love each other. (refers to subject)
Occasionally, they get angry at each other. (refers to subj. pronoun)
RECIPROCAL—TWO OR MORE
Our family loves each other.

ONE ANOTHER
One another expresses the same idea of reciprocity ("one and another"). However, some people use each other for two people and one another for more than two. Other people use each other and one another in the same contexts. This difference is disputed (not accepted by all.)
RECIPROCAL—TWO
Sophie loves Jim and Jim loves Sophie. ⇒ Sophie and Jim love one another¹.
Occasionally, they get angry at one another.
RECIPROCAL—TWO OR MORE
Our family loves one another. After a fight, everyone apologizes to one another. We all give one another holiday gifts.

Chart from: Grammar Quizzes  by Julie Sevastopoulos licensed for use under CC BY-NC-SA 4.0 International

Explanation of the Difference Between "Themselves" and "Each Other":

• "Themselves" is used when the subject is acting alone and receiving the action. It reflects back on the subject.
• "Each Other" is used when two or more people perform actions toward one another. It expresses mutuality between the subjects.

Examples of "Themselves" and "Each Other" 

Themselves (Reflexive Pronoun):

• Example 1: "The children were playing by themselves in the yard." (The children are playing alone, no one else is involved in the action.)
• Example 2: "They looked at themselves in the mirror." (The action reflects back on the subject, "they.")

Each Other (Reciprocal Pronoun):

• Example 1: "The children were playing with each other in the yard." (The children are interacting with one another, doing something together.)
• Example 2: "They helped each other with the homework." (The action is mutual between the two or more subjects.)

Exercise 2.13: Themselves or Each Other

Choose the correct pronoun ("themselves" or "each other") for the following sentences.

1. The children helped ______________________ with their homework.

2. The children are getting ____________________ ready to go to school.

3. The team worked together and helped ________________ to finish the task.

4. After the meeting, the team congratulated __________________ for their hard work.

5. They enjoyed looking at _________________ in the reflection on the lake.

6. They looked at ___________________ with frightened expressions on their faces. 

Exercise 2.14

Complete the sentence with a reciprocal or reflexive pronouns.

1. My sister and I helped _________________ yesterday. I helped her with her homework, and she helped me with mine.
2. “Help _________________________! Take what you want, I hope you enjoy the food!”
3. Neighbors should learn to help ______________________.
4. Maria talks to _________________ while she is cooking dinner.
5. Have you ever hurt __________________ while you were riding a bike?
6. He made __________________ a delicious sandwich when he returned from work.
7. My husband and I are architects so we built our house________________________.
8. People around the world should love and respect____________________ because we are all brothers and sisters.
9. They gave __________________ a hug when they said good-bye.
10. “Hi Mary! Did you enjoy _____________________ at the club?”
11. Peter and Vitoria love _____________________; they have been in love for many years.

Exercise 2.15

Fill in the blanks with "each other," "one another," "themselves," or "ourselves". Some questions may have two answers.

1. During the team-building exercise, the students had to trust and support ________________.
2. The children helped ________________ by sharing their toys and playing together.
3. The volunteers took care of _________________ by wearing appropriate safety gear and following guidelines.
4. We all gave ____________________ gifts for Christmas.
5. My husband and I enjoyed _______________________ on our trip to the beach.
6. The women looked at __________________ in the mirror as they put on their makeup.
7. It’s important for friends to listen to _________________ and offer support during difficult times.
8. The students were able to solve the problem by working with _______________ and sharing ideas.
9. In the group discussion, everyone should contribute and listen to _________________ to ensure a productive conversation.
10. They don’t need any help. They can do it ______________________.