5.5: Disobeying Rules of Discourse

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Bradley H. Dowden
California State University Sacramento

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A cardinal rule of good communication is to imagine yourself in the shoes of the person you are trying to communicate with. Here is another rule: If you don't like what someone has to say, don't let him say it again. That is not a rule of good communication; just a joke. This one is, though: Obey the rules of discourse. The rules of discourse are the rules that guide communicators in normal writing and conversation. These rules are the guidelines most everyone follows and expects others to follow. We try, for example, to interpret other people's speech the way they intend it to be interpreted. We try not to be long winded or roundabout. We try to be courteous. We violate a rule of discourse when we praise faintly. If we are going to praise something, we are normally expected not to praise it at a lower level than it deserves.

Some of the rules of discourse are rules of logical reasoning, and some are not. Interpreting someone's speech the right way is a rule of logical reasoning, but being courteous is not.

It's a rule of discourse not to ask someone to do the impossible, and it's a rule not to say something unless you believe it. That is why it is so odd to say, "That is true, but I don't really believe it." It is also a rule of discourse not to give too little information, or too much information, or irrelevant information.

These rules are for normal situations. You don't follow the rules when you want to keep information secret or when you want to distract people by providing them with so much information that they won't think to ask you the questions you don't want asked.

Exercise \(\PageIndex{1}\)

What rule of discourse are you violating if, when there is a knock on your door, you open it smiling and say, "You're not unwelcome to come in"?

Answer: Don't be roundabout.

Being sarcastic is a technique that intentionally violates the rules or that conveys a pessimistic opinion. Saying in a sarcastic tone "Yes, I believe you" conveys just the opposite. It is an interesting way to say, "No, I do not believe you." Isn’t it fascinating to analyze the rules of language? Not that you care.