5.1: Not Realizing What You Are Saying

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Page ID: 21978

Bradley H. Dowden
California State University Sacramento

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All of us sometimes say things that aren't quite what we mean, but those whose native language is not English have special troubles in this regard. Here are some examples of items written in English by non-native speakers:

Sign outside a doctor's office in Rome: "Specialist in women and other diseases."
Bucharest hotel lobby: "The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time, we regret that you will be unbearable."
In a Serbian hotel: "The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid."
On the menu of a Swiss restaurant: "Our wines leave you nothing to hope for."
In a Norwegian cocktail lounge: "Ladies are requested not to have babies at the bar."
In an Acapulco hotel: "The manager has personally passed all the water served here."¹

You wouldn't make errors like these, would you?

Exercise \(\PageIndex{1}\)

You’ve been hired by a Tokyo car rental firm to revise the following paragraph of its brochure in order to improve the English. How would you rewrite it?

When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.

Answer: You did get rid of "tootle," didn't you? There are many ways to rewrite the statement more clearly. Here is one: "Lightly honk your horn if a pedestrian blocks your path. If he continues to block your path, honk more vigorously."

1 These errors and many others have been circulating widely, but the above list is part of a longer list reported on by Jon Carroll in the San Francisco Chronicle, July 30, 1990